We need to talk about Dillon “The Villain” Brooks.
The NBA has always been more fun when heels are involved. Some heels are specific to a single city. For example, ask any Sacramento Kings fan how he feels about Big Shot Bob.
While some legendary NBA villains are the heels of every NBA team. Sometimes even his own team.
Just ask Jordan Poole about his teammate, Draymond Green.
There are rules to being an NBA villain. It’s not just about being hateful. If it were, I might consider my fellow Oregon Duck, Dillon Brooks, a legitimate league outlaw.
But to be considered an all-league badass, you have to be someone who puts butts in seats for the sole purpose of being your enemy. Say what you want about Patrick Beverly, but there are about 5 cities in the United States where a season ticket holder makes sure to keep his Chicago Bulls ticket just so he can shout out the now famous Russell Westbrook. “Pat Bev fooled them all” line in the most often despised defensive specialist.
No one goes to a Grizzlies game to see Dillon Brooks.
If you want to be a legitimate villain in the NBA, you have to be good at something. literally anything. I could be bouncing like Dennis Rodman. Or grab three-point shots like Reggie Miller.
What specifically is Dillon Brooks good at?
You can’t shoot. He scores in groups sometimes, but he’s never efficient. He had the eighth-worst field goal percentage in the entire league this year among qualified players.
He makes the second most 3-pointers per game on the Grizzlies, but he’s not in the top 10 on this year’s list in three-point percentage.
I’ve heard people call him a defensive specialist, but statistically he’s not in the top five for the Grizzlies in steals or blocks. And if you believe advanced stats like Defensive Box Plus/Minus or Victory Over Replacement, the stats say the Grizzlies are better when Brooks isn’t on the floor.
So not only does no one pay to see Dillon Brooks, he’s not particularly special about anything.
In fact, you can win almost a million dollars. bet the price of a latte from Starbucks in Brooks to have a decent game tonight against the Lakers.
Perhaps you can justify your status as a villain through the third criterion: Can he hold your attention?
We know that it can attract attention. Anyone can be ridiculous enough to make you look. Dillon Brooks can do that by coming to the stadium dressed as Stone Cold Steve Austin, or shoving a cameraman for no reason. Or hitting a second player this season in the groin. But a true villain is someone whose mere presence on the court distracts you.
Bruce Bowen hardly ever said a word, but when he was with the Spurs, you always had to watch him at all times. Watching Ron Artest prepare to check in at the scorer’s table would be enough to raise your hair on end.
But Dillon Brooks? He’ll give you goosebumps, but he doesn’t give anyone goosebumps. The man is just embarrassing. It’s like the Scott’s Tots episode of The Office made an NBA list.
You may be listening to this and thinking, “What’s with Oregon’s hate against Oregon?”
First of all, I don’t hate Dillon Brooks. That’s actually the point of this rant: that Dillon Brooks isn’t even good at trying to get people to hate him.
And second, Dillon Brooks was the 2017 Pac-12 Player of the Year. He had one of the biggest flops in basketball history. He wanted big things for Dillon Brooks.
But he can’t shoot even though he never stops shooting. He doesn’t bounce. He doesn’t pass. He can’t defend. And he continues to aggressively tag men where no man needs to be aggressively tagged… at least not during a basketball game.
None of it is funny or even compelling.
And now, all eyes are on Dillon Brooks because he decided he wanted to measure himself against LeBron James. Saying publicly that he doesn’t respect LeBron because LeBron has never lowered him to 40.
Well, Dillon Brooks has never lowered anyone’s 40. And maybe that’s why it seems like he doesn’t respect himself enough to play the game the right way, and instead, he’s decided to dress up as an NBA villain.
You’re not the bad boy. You are bad.
Let that sink in.
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